How LaFOL methodology differs from other coaching methodologies?
Usually the coaching process has a few, sometimes overlapping phases . Some of these are:
- identification of your own automatic reactions, moods and dominant ways of doing, including reactions under pressure or those arising under stressful conditions.
- definition of the goal or of what you don’t want in your life anymore and measurable conditions of satisfaction.
- development of the capability to center and weaken automatic reactions, moods and ways of doing that don’t serve the goal.
- building of new skills, capabilities and ways of doing that serve best in achieving your goal.
- through the understanding, the language and memory
- by working through emotions and moods that can predispose us to limited number of behaviors
- through the body, reaching dominant, conditioned, automatic reactions developed during lifetime
It doesn’t aim to ‘repair’ a human being. The goal is to develop very specific skills, behaviors or ways of doing. It ask fewer questions about “ Why”? (why I reacted in such a way, is it because of what happened in my childhood, etc). It focuses more on questions: ‘How’, for example: how to build trust; how to build satisfactory relationship with children, with a subordinate, with the boss; how to manage own commitments, how to build dignity, how to build the courage in pursuing what is important to me, how to find what is meaningful in my life.
Often new skills that we recently learned are available if we focus on them. However in the moments of physical, emotional or psychological fatigue or under stress – the old ways of responding action prevail. Through systematic work through the body we can embody new skills and make them available even in difficult situations.
Every person has a specific reaction to stressful situations. Biologically it defends a human being against the threat. It impacts heart beat, breathing, sweating but also dictates contractions of some muscles including those of the face. It prepares the body to act in a specific, pre-determined way every time. If we don’t manage it can hijack us. It happens to everyone. To react quickly in a situation in a way that we don’t really want, sometimes with anger, sometimes accepting something we don’t really want. We require a lot of energy to recognize and stop it; energy that is often missing at the end of the day or during longer stressful periods.
But do not despair! You have the power to learn how to diminish its destructive impact, working through the body. If we practice enough, this new way of centering our conditioned tendency can be available at any energy and stress level.
Our moods are critical to our relationships , ways of doing, range of emotions and to our own success and sense of fulfillment. Contrary to what we often believe, moods don’t catch us. We can shape our moods. Moods being a sort of longer term emotions occur in the whole body- not just in the mind. We can have an impact on our mood through logic and narratives, but we can do it much more effectively through the body.
It happens that despite professional and private life success, we feel a certain emptiness and lack of ‘joie de vivre’. Sometimes we feel lost: too many opportunities, too many success cases, too much publicity and media information. We don’t really feel what is important to us, what we really want, what makes our life unique. Integrated approach supports to touch what is deeply within us, what makes our life meaningful and full of taste.
When the LaFOL coaching approach can be effective:
Change in professional or private life. Change of the position, role at work or at home, change of the strategy, organization, approach. Main goal is to effectively go through the change, building new solutions, aligned with our visions and values, serving the best our new challenges and requirements.
Learning of new, additional, supportive skills, like:
- strategic thinking,
- building the cooperation based on trust and dignity of all parties,
- careful listening,
- clear communication of own opinions and beliefs,
- giving and receiving assessments,
- public speaking,
- generative conflict solving
Systematic practices in between sessions
to embody fully new skills and behaviors.
You are what you do.
- practices developing the ability to pay attention, to build awareness and as a consequence bring bigger choice of actions
- different practices and approaches opening core contractions (main automatic responses), enabling to build new skills and capacities
- different practices for building new skills and capacities